Friday, January 18, 2008

So, I'm at a new class last night called Turbo Kick. It's packed. The instructor subbed for my Total Body class Tuesday and I really liked her so I decided to check out her class since I missed my 6am Heat class. I show up ready to box my ass off (literally). We start doing a variation of Tae Bo and funky dance moves. "Ok, I can do this," I think. Then I start feeling a little "off." My stomach starts churning and I see myself in the mirror and my belly looks 3 months pregnant. I feel very bloated and on the brink of a gastrointestinal blow out. (I know, TMI, but we've all been there) Being the perfect student that I am, I'm on the front row, in the center. I'm trying to get a feel for when there will be a "water break" or something so that I can go to the bathroom. I didn't want to just run out in the middle of the class. I wasn't sure what was more awful: feeling my body as I was turbo kicking and needing to GET TO THE BATHROOM, or seeing my increasingly expanding stomach in the mirror as I kicked. Finally there was a break and I ran like a bat out of hell to the bathroom. Both stalls are occupied. In fact, seems like the women in there are "addressing" the same thing I want to address. As a pool of sweat accumulates on my upper lip, one stall becomes available. OH THANK GOD! I get in and......nada. Nothing. Zip, Zilch, Zero. No relief. So, I then think: "Ok, this is a mind game. I'm going to go back to the class, finish and then head home. I must have eaten something that is just causing me to feel bloated."

I get back into the class and take my awkward place back up front and do my best to keep up. All my "moves" are slow and half assed. All I can do is stare in horror at my belly. I swear, I now looked 4-5 pregnant. I'm not kidding you! I had more air in me than a hot air balloon and with each kick I swore I would blast them all away! Luckily I made it through the class without taking anyone out. I left, jogged to my car, sped home and ran straight upstairs with a knowing nod to Ed. This time my body did it's thing and I was back to my pre pregnancy belly in no time! Ha ha

I took a long, hot bath and finished reading my book: Love in the time of Cholera. Ironically the first page I read had to do with a man having a gastrointestinal distress from nerves. I thought that was funny.

As funny as yesterday was, I didn't eat so well. I'm due for my "lady business" in a few days and I'm wanting to eat salty and sweet things all day long. I cannot be satisfied. So yesterday consisted of a variety of over processed foods. Granted, I only went over my point by 5 pts or so, but it was just yucky stuff like Goldfish, WW icecream cones, Olestra laden chips (it's all making sense), and diet soda. The perfect storm.

Luckily my Flex renewed today and I'm feeling better. I battle this every month. My hormones surge and I feed my body shit and then get shit back as a result. When will I learn?

I planned to make the Heat class today but Amelia woke with a low grade fever and running nose. So, no Y chlidcare for her today. I might try to run on the treadmill. In fact, I should do that right now since she's napping!

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