Saturday, June 24, 2006

It's incredibly hard for me to post a picture of myself right now. I'm 180 lbs (8 weeks post partum) and let me tell you, 180 lbs seems to look better when I look in the mirror and not so much when a picture is taken. I specifically wore a tank top so that you can see my arms. I used to have the best arms- thin, but toned. Now I avoid showing them. I want that to change. I want to be able to put clothes on and not think about my arms. Now- my post partum tummy is another story. I'm throwing around the idea of a tummy tuck as my ultimate reward for getting to my goal (130lbs). But I'm not sure if that's something I can go through with. Surgery scares me and of course it will cost ya! But regardless-I'm on this path come hell or high water. The good, the bad, and the ugly. It's all part of the journey. The weightloss started 2 months ago when I gave birth to my daughter Amelia. I was 225 lbs right before I delivered. I lost the first 25 lbs leaving the hospital. The other 20 lbs has been due to nursing and a month on Jenny Craig. I opted to do Jenny Craig because I knew they had a nursing mother's plan and I knew I didn't have to think a whole lot. I just ate was on the plan. I did well. Lost 20 lbs. But since it was 20 lbs for $20- I stopped once I lost the 20 lbs because I didn't want to pay more money to join. So Weight Watchers it is! I know in my heart it's the only plan I can really see myself on for the rest of life. Lord knows I've tried them all. Atkins, Jenny Craig (twice), The Zone, Fit For Life (food combining), The Maker's Diet, plain old calorie counting, yada, yada, yada. I definitely get points for creativitiy and diversity. Unfortunately none of them were plans I could be on forever. And- the more I think about it WW is not so much a "diet" as it is a guide. It's a lifestyle. I joined WW (Weight Watchers) the first time before I got pregnant with my first child. I loved it and lost 15 lbs (which was all I needed to lose). I was somewhere around 145lbs (size 8). After I had my son (gained 60 lbs) - I got back down to 165 lbs (size 10). I lost the pregnancy weight with a mix of things- breastfeeding, doing WWs online, and practicing some intuitive eating (only listening to your hunger cue- not paying attention to WHAT you eat). But- I know I could have lost more if I had actually stuck to WW daily.

So here I will document my journey as it happens. Part of my reason for blogging is to keep me on track. It helps to get things out and reflect. It also helps to be accountable to those that read the blog. I was so inspired by another woman who had virtually the same high weight and goals as myself. She blogged her journey ( from day one and I read every journal entry. It boosted my motivation and only confirmed that I can do this. This will be my third time joining Weight Watchers and I want it to be my last. I've decided just doing it online doesn't keep me going. So-though I've been on WW for 2 weeks now- my first weigh in will be this week. Wish me luck!

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