Is your diet your religion?

I'm always sort of browsing different eating approaches.  Absorbing little nuggets and leaving whatever else behind.   One thing I've noticed is a lot of the same thing.  For example, I've noticed a new way of eating called "Primal" eating.  Or living the "primal lifestyle."  And then I found out its somewhat connected to Cross Fit.  And so I had a discussion with a friend who eats The Paleo Diet (with a good sense of balance and actually enjoys it!) and he described to me what the primal lifestyle is. Turns out this new, extreme, cutting edge (but eating like our ancestors) diet is pretty much avoiding processed foods and doing interval training.  Huh.  Okay.  I think I do that.

So here's the thing: why do we need extreme dieting?  Of course living the primal lifestyle is great- I'm not knocking it at all.  But, why do we need labels?  Why can't we just eat well, indulge here and there and be merry?  Why so hardcore?  Why so "lifestyle?"  I'll admit that I really like the idea of doing a specific diet.  Ones where there are "good" foods and "bad" foods.  It feeds my type A personality.  It gives you rules that you must adhere to and when you follow those rules, you are "good."  And you see results.  But the best part about it is that you're in a new club. Complete with clicks.  It's fabulous!  There are message boards, workout groups, twitterers.  With each new diet, there is a new religion.

"I don't eat carbs."

"I'm primal."

"I'm Atkins."

"I'm Weight Watchers."

"I eat clean."

"I'm fasting."

"I'm South Beach."

"I don't eat anything white."

"I only eat small babies"

And it's all cool and stuff until you see a chocolate croissant....

 And you've been really good up until the chocolate croissant.  "Is there an extreme croissant diet I can follow?" you think.  No?  Shit.  Thing is- you haven't even cared about sugar until now.  But it looks....so....good.  You see that skinny girl over there eating the croissant.  "She's thin.  She's eating a croissant.  Why can't I be skinny and eat a croissant?" (you can, btw) Yeah, you've been fine eating your turkey bacon, egg white glob for breakfast with a side of fat free plain (blech) yogurt.  It's delicious, right?  But see, if you eat that croissant, you won't be living the extreme **fill in the blank** lifestyle will you?  You'll just be normal.  And who wants to be that?

I've been a successful fitness junkie and "dieter" for 4 years now.  I've been "dieting" for way longer than that- but it's only the past 4 yrs I've had success and actually figured out some things.  I lost 75 lbs.  I went from "walking 2 miles is really, really hard" to running, cycling and bootcamping regularly.  So, I guess I do have some insight into what "sticks" and what doesn't.  For me- extremeness doesn't stick.  It does the opposite.  I'd do really, really well for about a month on an extreme diet- then I'd binge from all the restrictions. Sure, I'd see results, but I can't maintain it.  And I don't like the emotional baggage that comes with extreme dieting (you're good when you're on it, bad when you're not).

 And then the mind games start:  "Since I messed up today, my weekend is blown- so I'll just start over Monday."  And who knows-  you may consume 30,000 calories between now and Monday.  But in your mind- calories/food don't really count until Monday.  Right?  And Lord knows you're going to get on that damn scale and weight yourself just in time to catch your upward swing from the binge and then be even MORE defeated mentally.  No thanks.  I'm sure there are many successful dieters out there that really thrive on extremeness.  "I haven't had cheese since 1997" and all that nonsense.  But, really, if the average joe wants to lose weight and keep it off- there's got to be a more balanced way.   I've been lectured here on my blog for how many pt/calories I'm taking in with my mochas.  I don't care.  Because any diet that makes me give up mochas is dead to me.  They are my deal breakers.  I don't care how much sugar they have.  I don't care how many points or calories they are.  All I care about is that I can order a double tall, non fat, no whip mocha when I get a hankering for one.

Make sure balance is a part of your eating.  Imagine a giant pendulum swinging.  The healthiest place is in the middle.  A good indicator as to whether you're being extreme in your eating is if you find yourself judging others for what they eat.  Don't make your diet your identity/religion/moral compass.   Because if that happens, when you slip up or fail or whatever (and you will because that's life),  you need to get back on the horse without any shame or guilt.  It's not about perfection- it's about progress.  I've found that food and fitness have to be integrated into your life.  They don't become your life.  When you wake up in the morning- what do you want to eat?  I'm sorry- but I've never woken up and wanted eggwhites.  Ever.  Some people do.  And they are weird.  But I have woken up and wanted lowfat yogurt with almonds.  Or Ezekiel bread with homemade preserves.   Or steel cut oatmeal with an apple.  Now, if you're wanting a donut every morning, then you need to find balance.  If it's a craving that won't go away- then go have your donut.  If you still crave it- then maybe compromise and have some Nutella on Ezekiel bread.

I do believe we all have our trigger foods...

I can't do tortilla chips or cookie dough.  Not together- separately.  Although dipping tortilla chips in cookie dough is actually turning me on a little.  Er...   Those foods trigger binge eating for me. I will literally keep eating until there is no more.  So, I'm mindful of my triggers.  If I just can't stop thinking of a snack or meal involving my trigger foods- then I'll have it.  But if I'm smart I'll ask my husband or a friend to eat them with me and keep me accountable.  Otherwise you'll find me locked in the bathroom nom nom-ing on cookie dough.

Striking a balance between feeding my body whole foods and letting myself have a treat every once in a while is where I'm trying to remain right now.  And I suppose I could give you a list of whole foods and what not- but it's nothing new.  You're smart- you know what's whole and what's not.  I think it's just a matter of doing it.

Listening to what my body really wants and not obsessing over food is where I want to be.  I'm going to write more on this later- but I'm really digging some books on this.  Food addiction anyone?

When Food Is Love by Geneen Roth

Why Can't I Stop Eating?  by  Debbie Denowski

"I'm a good stomach bug from my goal weight"

I'm sure you've heard that before.  Well, turns out it is quite an efficient way to lose some pounds.  I highly recommend it!  I woke up yesterday feeling off.  I had 3 drinks the night before with my friend and hubby.  But that was over a long period of time and I was, by no means, drunk.  But, nonetheless, I woke up feeling sick.  No head ache, just stomach aching and yucky.  It's always hard to tell with me because when I get sick- I get sick down south.  I'm not a puker.  I'm classy like that.  Eventually I realized I was not hung over (yah me!), but had a bug.  And here I am 24 hours later still experiencing, ahem, the bug.  I'll spare you accurate, yet comical descriptions of what it's like.  Like, comparing my bowel movements to a coke machine would be funny and accurate, but gross.  And, like I said- I'm classy.

So, I haven't left the house in the last  2 days.  There have been no mochas in sight.  Caffeine headaches came and went.  And I'm down 2 lbs.  If I could arrange for a stomach bug to come every other week, that would be fabulous.  We could have a chain gang of germ passers, all committed to one cause: explosive diarrhea.

I think it's gonna take off.

I'm not a fan of working out while dehydrated and recovering from illness, so I'm not doing anything today.  I was able to get a good run in Friday.  5 miles.  This time in 56 mins!  I wasn't trying to up my time- but I noticed because last time it was 58 mins.  I think it had something to do with the rain.  I ran faster to make it end sooner.

I'm determined to put my bike helmet on this week and go riding.  It's been too long and my road bike was too expensive to sit in my garage.  Plus it's got cute little girly swirls on it.  Who wouldn't want to ride that?  (that's what she said)

Bootcamp starts on FRIDAY!  ACK!!!!

And Then There Were None

Back from the mountains with not one picture to prove I was there.  I survived the car ride with the kids without any major meltdown from myself or the kids.  (Score)  I had dreams of going to parks, walking through creeks, feeding ducks, horses, etc.  Then it snowed 3 inches.  


And I was pissed enough about it that I didn't take pictures.  


It was in the upper 20's to lower 30's the whole time and snowing or raining.  Yuck.  I got in zero, zilch, nada workouts.  Not one.  I'm a complete wimp about exercising outdoors in cold weather.  And I didn't have any of my indoor stuff that I use here at home.  I hate being cold.  Hate, hate, hate it.  You know how they say the hardest part of getting out there and working out is putting your shoes on and getting out the door?  Not so.  I've done that before and it was so cold I ran back to my house.  In fact, I've run my fastest mile when running back to my house-fleeing the workout. 


So this weekend was filled with 24/7 HGTV.  Holmes on Homes, Househunters, International Househunters, Property Virgins, Divine Design, and Designed to Sell.  It's how my mom and I bond.  (you take what you can get) Yes, I went to the Great Outdoors to sit in the Great Room Indoors and watch TV.  The good news is that my mom took the other kids back with her to her house (The mountain house is just her vacation home....  I know.)  So the kids should get some fun filled, sunny days outdoors at my mom's house that is set on a huge lot with lots outside play time.  And I get a break and only have one kid.  

ONE KID!  It's like a dream vacation!  I can see it now: waking up, going to starbucks, playing some blocks, changing a diaper maybe, and then....what for it.....NAP TIME!  


So this week I have no excuses.  I have ample time to get some good, sweaty stuff in (that's what she said) and burn some calories.  


I'm reading a book called "The End of Overeating" by David A. Kessler, MD.  Really enjoying it.  Learning a lot. Will share more on that later.


I'm also reading "So Long, Insecurity" by Beth Moore.  Good, good stuff.  Solid.  These days I'm all about dealing with issues deep down to the root.  Not a fan of putting a bandage on a big, gaping wound.  Learned my lesson- definitely worth dealing with your junk.  Like: what motivates to have the goals you have?  Are they healthy goals?  


Another book my friend told me about and is on hold at the library is : "Women, Food and God" by Geneen Roth.  Sounds right up my alley.  :)


I'm also reading an Agatha Christie book called And Then There Were None.  About a bunch of people that were invited to an island by a mystery host.  Then they all get murdered, one by one.  That settles it, I'm never going to an island if someone mysteriously invites me.  No way.  


That has nothing to do with this post.  But maybe I'll work it into the title.   


Okay-so off to throw a load in the wash.  Settle myself back into homeland.  Missed my husband.  Looking forward to some movie nights with him this week.  With cheese and crackers.  Because, without fail, he gets snacky at night and that's his snack of choice. 






Jen

Falling in love with running again

Or maybe I'm just high on the endorphins.  Lately any time I got out and ran I felt like I was dragging kettle bells behind me.  It felt too hard.  I mean, it's supposed to challenge me, but not like running under water.

But today was different. 

 I did my old 5 miler route and really enjoyed it.  The first 2 miles always suck.  But then my body got in the groove and I just zoned out and listened to music.  I'm a very slow runner.  Like, some people can walk faster than I can run.  I don't care.  I have no desire to increase my time like the cool kids.  I'm all about finishing the distance, not killing myself to get there 5 minutes faster.  And if that's not good enough- then I'll just pull out my "I gave birth without medication" card and that'll shut them up.  Anyway, I did 5 miles in just under 59 minutes and burned 659 calories!  It felt so good.  And I finally got the runner's high around mile 4.  You know that high where your legs just keep moving and you feel like you can go forever?  Everything becomes harmonious and you feel at peace and your body is running like a well oiled machine?  And the birds start chirping and bambi comes to cheer you on? Yeah..   But then you see your car in the distance and think "Oh for fucks sake- thank God it's over!"

So that was this morning.

Now I'm planning my Friday which happens to be a fun one because the hubs is taking off early today AND the high is 70 degrees AND I'm looking forward to going to the park this afternoon with the kids.  Fischer's first official baseball game is tomorrow- which has me so excited I don't know what to do with myself.  He and I practiced outside last night for 2 hours.  Throwing balls, catching calls (that's what she said), grounders, hitting, etc.  I love me some baseball. My husband will make fun of me, but I was on varsity softball all through high school and loved it.  He makes fun of me because I say that a lot.  It was the formal "I gave birth naturally" card.  Anyway,  I hope to coach as all the kids get older.  Though I might get all hard core on their asses and make them do suicides and planks and stuff like that.

Speaking of planks- Bootcamp starts in 2 weeks!!!  Ack!  I'm not so worried about the workouts since I've been prepping for a month.  It's the adjustment of getting up at the butt crack of dawn that I'm dreading.  But, as I always do, I'll get used to is.  But I feel for my poor little boot campers.  They have no idea all the horrible things I'll unleash on their asses.  I feel like I've written "asses" a lot in this post.

Huh.

Well, on that note.  I'm going to get my ass to a Cuban restaurant to eat before picking up the middle kid from school.  Get outside if it's nice where you are!  Move!!  :)

Jazz hands,

Jen

I am here, just busy

This week has been full of doula business.  Consults, prenatals, and teas.  Oh my.

I did however get a kettle bell workout in here and there.  I saw  one at Target that had a 25 min dvd workout.  I had been seeing some blogs of gals who use them lately and figured I'd try them out.   I burned 200 calories in 25 mins!  Of course, I got the 20 lb kettle ball, because, well, I'm a bad ass, right?   No.

Maybe I should have started with a 10 lb bell.

Going to get another workout in today.  Turkish get ups will be the death of me.

This week has gotten away from me.  I'm leaving town with all 3 kids SOLO!  I'm meeting my mom in the mountains to get my city kids in nature.  I enjoy the mountains because there are so many trails to choose from and so many ways to be active.  And so many coffee shops with so many mochas.  I inherited my mocha madness from my mom.  We live and breath everything mocha.

Where was I?  Oh,   I also love that the kids can just go outside and explore and the only threat is bambi. In fact, lots of bambis (or is that bambies?  Or bambi- but pronounced like octopi?) come around there.  My mom leaves out deer food so as to lure them in.  She also has a thing for dwarfs.  She thinks she's snow white.

Anyway, it helps us all just breath real air and see nature.  Step away from routine, video games, blogging, twitter and cement and see God's creation.  And we're all better for it.  Bless their hearts....

 
I'll bring my kettle bell there so I can enjoy the strange looks from my mom.  But I'll also be outdoors most of the time and will plan a few runs.  I'll have some pics from my adventures...

Some days you wake up, walk into your bathroom and you see this:

I like how the clothes are stacked like a triple decker ice cream cone.  And how I still insist on putting the wicker top on it, like the cherry on top.  Like that somehow makes it neater.  And as tempting as it is to spend nap time (aka workout time) catching up on laundry and what not, I know I need to get my workout in.  

Here's how to get a good workout with out a gym membership or a tread mill:

Get a good heart rate  monitor

Some dumb bells.  

Even if I'm working my legs- I used dumb bells in the squats or lunges. 

A plan or calorie goal

Here's my squatting.  My pants are blending with the black blob in the back ground- thereby making my ass into a black blob.  My apologies.  My goal is to get my azzz to the coffee table and SQUEEZE at the top.  It's not a squat without the squeeze at the top.  ;)

Sweaty, 400 calorie afterglow:

Cardio ideas or indoors:

Burpees

Run up and down stairs

Double foot hop up stairs

Inchworm around living room

Jumping Jacks

Jump rope

(I don't jump rope because I piss my pants.  True Story)

You can sequences or combos of any of these and mix them up.  Putting some strength in between cardio sets.

Thankfully I do have a tread mill and that helps tremendously when I'm trying to get some good cardio in.  I'm not a hamster, so I don't like just running and running.  I like intervals.  Something like this:

Run 2 mins at X speed

30 forward lunges

Run 2 mins at X speed

20 push ups

Run 2 mins at X increased speed

20 hammer curls

Run 1 min at X speed, then increase to a sprint for 1 min

20 tricep dips

Walk on 10 incline for  2 mins

20 push ups

Cool down jog for 2 mins

20 squats

 1 min plank

I'll usually have a calorie goal and shoot for that.  Sometimes if I have 50 calories to go I'll just go up and down my stairs until I reach my goal.  Just play with it.  You'll be amazed at what a good, tough workout you can get in your living room.  Make sure your form is good.  Look up exercises on youtube and watch the form.  Bad form can result in injury or a waste of time (not working).  

Now stop reading about it and go do it!   ;)

OMG Omega 3!

Recently I've been inspired to up my family's fish intake.  Fish and I have not had the best of beginnings.  Mainly because I sucked at making fish.  So I'd buy the frozen kind.  Like, fishsticks.  What?  They're good dipped in ketchup!  And one time I created a more sophisticated meal with fishsticks inside a tortilla with a dollop of tartar sauce.  They were "fish tacos" and they were gross.  Eventually I put my big girl panties on and made some actual fish recipes.  And wouldn't you know- they were actually good!  You always hear people say: "I don't like fishy fish."  I know what they mean, but that's kind of like saying you don't like chickeny chicken.  Or beefy beef.  Would that just be big, ripped beef?  Like a a piece of sirloin walking around with dumbells and a man-o-tard.  Er..... okay.  I think fish will taste like fish.  And selecting the freshest of fish and pairing it with the right seasonings and flavors, it's quite tasty!  My favorite fish is salmon.  It has a wonderful flavor and can be seasoned a million and one different ways.   It's loaded with high doses of Omega 3 fatty acids. 

So, what are "Omega-3's" anyway?  What's the fuss?  Omega-3 fatty acids are a type of unsaturated fatty acid that's thought to reduce inflammation throughout the body.  They are believed to improve learning ability in children, decrease triglycerides, lower blood pressure, reduce blood clotting, enhance immune function and improve arthritis symptoms.  Consuming one to two servings a week of fish, particularly fatty fish, appears to reduce the risk of heart disease (particularly sudden cardiac death).  

Not all fish are created equal.  If you want more Omega bang for your buck- go with salmon or herring.  Salmon being the more popular fatty fish.  And even tuna to a lesser extent- but not as good as salmon. There are also differences between freshwater and sea fish.  Fatty fish of the sea (saying that makes me laugh) have the highest omega-3 fatty acids.  While tilapia does contain some omega-3's- it's not as much as salmon.  But, being more budget friendly, its a popular choice.   And it's better than no fish at all.  

Cooking Fish

Rule #1- Buy Fresh!

Rule #2- Buy Fresh!

Rule #3-Buy Fresh!

I now just wait to buy my fish until the day I'm making it.  That works for me.  That way I don't put it off and lose the fresh factor and then freeze it.  "Why not freeze you ask?"  Because my personal opinion is that it's just not as good.  It's "fishier" when frozen and thawed.  And I just plain don't like it.  And there's always the chance it could get buried in your freezer and you'll end up tossing it after finding it 9 months later.  So I just prefer getting it the same day.  And if you can get to a farmer's market near you- even better (and cheaper).  

Here are some no brainer fish recipes off the top of my head.  The easier and quicker they are to make- the more likely I'll actually make them. 

Tilapia w/ tomato caper sauce

Tilapia filets

1 can italian seasoned diced tomatoes (or add basil/oregano)

1 tbsp capers

1/2 a small onion, diced

1 clove garlic, minced

2 tbsp olive oil

Juice of 1 lemon

Preheat oven to 400.  Saute olive oil, onion and garlic until fragrant.  Add tomatoes and capers.  Let stew a bit while you prepare tilapia pouches.  Lay out a large square piece of tin foil for each tilapia filet.  Place a filet on each pc of foil.  Squeeze lemon over each piece of fish, generously.  Salt lighty and pepper with real cracked pepper.  Top about 1/2 cup of tomato caper sauce over fish. Fold up pouch tightly on top and roll up sides to create a seal.  Cook about 10-15 mins until fish is white and flakey.  Top over some brown rice, making sure all the wonderful juices are poured over everything.  

Lemon Dill Salmon or Tilapia

Salmon or Tilapia filets

olive oil

lemon-juice

fresh dill

Preheat oven to 400.  Create foil pouches and place salmon inside.  Drizzle each filet with some olive oil, lemon juice and fresh snipped dill.  Seal it up and bake!  Squeeze some more fresh lemon juice on top before serving.  Pair with green veggies like roasted asparagus or steamed broccoli with lemon juice.  

Salmon is lovely with sweet flavoring.  My favorite is at Publix.  I get their Bourbon Marinated Salmon on a special occasion.  But for 5.99 per filet- that's not often.  A nice marinade for salmon is OJ and soy sauce.  Just put some oj in a bowl, a few splashes of soy sauce, some honey maybe, garlic powder and there you go.  Pour over salmon in baking dish and let stew for 30 mins and then bake, covered with foil to seal the juices in.  

You can even put pesto on Tilapia and bake it in a pouch.  Ba-da-bing!  Or is that boom?

Favorite Fish Pairing Veggies:

Roasted Asparagus (tossed with olive oil, balsamic vinegar, garlic, honey and S&P)

Steamed broccoli with Mrs. Dash and lemon juice

Roasted butternut squash (tossed with feta cheese right before serving)

Blanched green beans (same as asparagus)

Sauteed Kale w/ garlic and olive oil (place fish on top)

My family (kids included) will eat all these fish and veggies- so I really have no excuse not to make them.  My 15 month old just put away an entire tilapia filet at lunch today.  I lucked out on the kid taste bud thing.  Or maybe I just keep offering "exotic" dishes like fish and veggies and if they knew what was good for them, they'd eat them.  I've never been a short order cook, so my kids either eat the meal or starve.

Here's my tilapia lunch today.  Soooo good!

If you cannot get your omega-3's from natural resources (which are the best!!)- you can get them through supplementation.  I take 1 fish oil capsule with each meal (up to 3 a day).  My kids take them too.  They come in cute, little gum drop looking pieces and they think it's candy.  The dumb little darlings.    Another way (not the only) to get some omega-3's is in flaxseed oil.  You can put flaxseed oil in oatmeal, smoothes, veggies, yogurt, whatever.  My 15 month old suffers from exzcema and allergies- so he gets 1/2 tsp daily.  I cannot tell you what a difference it makes in his skin.  Older kids would get around a 1 tbsp/day.  But you'll have to research that yourself.  Too much will give them the runs.  So play with it.  The dosage, not the runs. 

Here are the brands I use:

Spectrum Flax Oil (needs to be refrigerated)

365 Brand Fish Oil

Nordic Natural Omega-3 Gummies

Supplements are great, but if you do even a half assed amount of research you'll find that it is always more beneficial to get your vitamins/minerals/oils from the real thing.  Don't fool yourself into thinking that taking a fish oil capsule with those oreos is good for you.  That is hypothetical, of course.   I would never do that.  I mean, really.  If you DID do that, then make sure you dunk them in skim milk.  Because that's definitely healthier. 

Jazz hands,

Jen

How to get up and workout

Some days I'm so lazy.  And when I get lazy, I get LAZY. And those days it's hard to peel myself off of Word with Friends on my iphone and do my workout.  (my screen name is Jenrosegordon JUST in case you want to play me).  And on these days if I let my brain churn long enough and procrastinate- I will likely rationalize my way out of a workout.  

Me: It's raining outside. Huh.

Rockstar Me: Um, yeah. So?

Me: Well, I was planning to run for my cardio today.

Rockstar Me: You have a treadmill. Or you can do some interval training in the living room. You have options. Adapt.

Me (with a side of martyr mommy syndrome) : But I hate running on the treadmill. Maybe I should rest today. Studies show that people who get enough sleep are skinnier. And I have THREE kids. That's, like, hard. Besides, there's a ton of laundry and I need to clean the bathroom.  

Rockstar Me: You are full of shit.

Most fitness lovers will tell you that the hardest part of getting that daily workout in is putting your shoes on.  So true.  Here are some strategies that help me:

• Workout before your brain can wake up-excuses start pouring in if you let the day go on and on
• Sleep in your workout clothes- one less thing you have to do
• Go to bed early
• Plan your workouts for the week
• Change it up.  If you hated that 3 mile path you took last week, well then don't do it again.  Find a new path.  
• Tell yourself you'll only do 15 mins.  That way the pressure is off.  But many times you'll end up extending it. 
• Set a calorie burn goal for the week.  (Buy a good heart monitor)  Some days I set a goal to burn 500 in my workouts.  Other days it's 200.  No matter what number- seeing that number increase as you go really  motivates you.  Even if you only burn 150 calories a day during your workouts- that's still 1050 calories/week!
• Find new and interesting exercises.  I like to go on you tube and browse around. 
• Lastly (this is for me as much as it's for anyone else)- just because you're a mom does not mean you can't workout.  You have the time- chances are you're not making it.  The idea of getting up at 6am to workout made me cringe too.  I really didn't believe that 6am existed until I had kids.  If it's not 6am, then make it nap time.  Squeeze it in.  It's far better to get a workout in, benefiting from the relaxing endorphins, than to feel too stressed to work out.  And what a good role model for your kids! 

Once again- copied a workout from Girl Hero.  Again, I'm lazy.  Burned 280 calories.  Threw in a 1 min plank and some push ups too. 

Jump rope -2 minutes (I mock jump rope because jumping jacks make me piss my pants.  True story.)

25 lunges – each leg for 50 total (remember to lunge deep)

50 squats (azz to the grazz)

15 burpees

15 jump squats

And my playlist:

Mr. Brightside- The Killers

Spotlight- Mute Math (This song makes me want to move)

Like I Love You-Justin Timberlake

Lovesong-Annie Stela

Ray of Light- Madonna

Ageless Beauty-Stars

Supermassive Black Hole- Muse

Maps-Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Full Moon-Black Ghosts

Obstacle 1-Interpol

Mushaboom-Feist

It Don't Matter to the Sun-Rosie Thomas

Mother Loving Arms

Went on a 3 mile run this morning after dropping #2 off at school.  I like to run through the rich neighborhoods here in down town Atlanta.  I imagine I am a southern bell named Buffy (not the vampire) and I have boys that I dress like girls until they're strong enough to resist.  Then I have a nanny that I just ADORE and I exercise and shop all day.  And do occasional volunteer work at my eldest child's private preschool that costs my nanny's salary for a 3 day/week spot.   And my arms probably look like this:

Speaking of arms, aren't Kelly Ripa's arms amazing???  They are my new celebrity wanna be body part. I love strong arms.  To me they symbolize motherhood.  I never had sculpted arms before I became a mother.  And then after I had #1 I noticed tone.  Even before I got into fitness.  For me there is definitely a fine line between sculpted arms and "Holy Mother Lover- are you a man or woman" arms.  I mean, if that's what you're after- well done!  But I prefer maybe one notch below GI Jane.  And hair.  On my head, not my arms.  

As it stands- I can't even do 1 pull up.  Not one.  And I've tried.  So my new fitness goal is to bump up the arms a little.  And be able to do a pull up by May.  Mother's Day!  Mutha sculpted arms.  

Anyhoo- here's my playlist today during my run:

Interpol-Obstacle 1

Supermassive Black Hold- Muse

Lovesong- Annie Stela

Ageless Beauty- Stars

Wake Up-Arcade Fire

Happier-A Fine Frenzy

Good Morning- Rogue Wave

Hearing Damage-Thom Yorke

What are your celebrity body part crushes?

(that sounds weird, but I'm going with it)

Arrrrhhhhh Planks...

I was too busy sleeping this morning to bother getting up for my workout.  So now, of course, I'm doing it post kid bedtime. The usual time I would be snuggled in the couch with the hubs, watching season 4 of The Wire.  I've also been lazy about my water consumption today and now gulping down my last few cups of water.  

 So, I'm doing planks:

And here's why... The other day after having done planks for a few weeks now I noticed a spark of what COULD be some actual stomach tone.  Like, maybe even the beginning of the first two packs of the 6 pack.  Kinda.  Sorta.  Do you see it??  Of course I darkened the picture to pick up on any shadow of a hint of muscle there.  And I clumsily took the pic to capture the moment (for fear of it going away) with photo booth because I didn't have my phone or camera near by.  Sort of like I do with the kids when they're all playing happily and smiling (for fear of it going away).  

There- do you see it?  Have I mentioned how unbelievably happy I am that I got the tummy tuck????!!  I know I probably sound vain.  I really don't mean to sound like that.  It's just that I have worked really hard for years to get in shape and be toned.  But my stomach has been what felt like a weird tumor on my body- even with my intense workouts.  It didn't match up.  I was wearing size 4s and having this giant skin sack thing draping over them.  It just felt very uncomfortable.  When I look at my "before." , I'm really proud of how far I've come (even if I did choose plastic surgery to help me get there).   I know lots of us mamas have the fluffly skin apron going on- but you gotta cut a sister a break when she's finally got a real stomach again.

Okay, enough about my rock hard abs of steal.  My bootcamp starts in less than a month.  I've been preparing myself for it with interval training.  I'm really weak on the cardio.  Like, I sound like a smoker when I do more than 2 mins of cardio.  Its amazing to me that I used to run 5 miles like it was no biggie. I've been utilizing my treadmill doing things like this: 

1 minute jog

30 jumping lunges

1 minute jog

30 sec sprint

30 squats

1 minute jog

Wash, rinse and repeat 3X

Pretty good for a 30 mins or so interval workout on and off the treadmill.  Makes me not despise hate loathe dislike the treadmill so much.  Tonight I did a strength interval.  It went something like this:

Pike push ups (as many as will allow w/ good form)

30 shitty Jumping Lunges

20 Rows with 15 lbs dumbells in each hand

Repeat 3X

Then:

Biceps-3 sets of 12

Pizza Server extensions-1 set of 20

Tricep Dips- 3 sets of 12

Squats with 10 lb dumbells- 3 sets of 12

Bout' 30 mins

And for fun- here was my play list during my workout:

Arcade Fire- Keep the Car Running

Spotlight- Mute Math

Mushaboom-Feist

Stood Up-A Fine Frenzy

Starlight- Muse

Maps- Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Full Moon-Black Ghosts

The Violet Hour- Sea Wolf

Being content in all things

Been looking through some old pictures.  Found some after Amelia was born.  I think I was around 180 lbs here.  That was right at the beginning of my weight loss.  

And my bout with alcoholism....

Not really.  But seeing the pictures got me thinking.  Life happens whether you're fat, skinny, toned or flabby.  You can spend a good year of your life half assed following a plan, but not really getting anywhere.  And chances (if you're anything like me), you spend that year feeling depressed and mad at yourself about your weight.  It colors everything.  And who cares what good things happened that year because you were "fat."  After all, life doesn't begin to look good until you're a size 6, right?  Sounds ridiculous, I know.  But I'll be the first to admit that's the way I operated (consciously or unconsciously) for a long time.  Skinny was the destination.  There was nothing really before or after that.  

So I got skinny.  I was in 4's.  I had never been in 4's my entire adult life.  4's were "success."  I mean, check out my legs!  Phew!  Now I could be happy.  You know, cause I was skinny.

And then I got pregnant and gained my standard 55 lbs.

Don't get me wrong- I was thrilled to be pregnant.  I wanted a third baby.  But I found that all my mojo and motivation seeped out of me during that pregnancy.  I continued my workouts, ate Chick Fil A Milkshakes a well balanced diet with healthy amounts of dairy and was eager to give birth and cuddle my new little boy.  I had a very empowering birth and was high on that for weeks.  But then life settled in.  My sweet baby had extreme colic (which we know now were multiple allergies) and never slept.  Like, ever.  I had two babies before and their "never slept" was his good nights.  I think I suffered from post partum depression, but never really wanted to admit it.  Just kept focusing on getting back to where I was before Shepherd.  "If I could just start running again."  "If I could just follow WWs like I need to."  "If I could just sleep a little."  "If I could just get back to the Y."  I was trying desperately to get back to where I was.  Get back control.  Be skinny.  Be happy.  THEN, I would be content.  

I would compare my weight loss to my big weight loss after Amelia was born.  "I need to lose x amount of weight by 16 weeks post partum if I want reach my goal by this date."  But I couldn't stick with the plan to save my life.  It was not working the way it worked before.  And so I eventually came to the conclusion that I failed.  

But soon enough I realized that was a dumb conclusion.  The real conclusion was that this was not 2006.  This was 2009.  What worked before may not work now.  Instead of blaming myself and trying to fit a square into a circle- I realized things were different now.  A good different.  And I needed to except that.  Life looks WAY different with three kids than it looked with two.  (Understatement of the century)  And so I needed to adapt.  And so I'm adapting.  And I'm reaching my goals, but it's happening slower than before.  And I've learned to be okay with that.  I'm about 10 lbs from pre pregnancy weight.  And that's okay.  My baby is only 15 months old.  And I'm only going to have these moments with him once.  My body has been good to me.  It's given me three beautiful children and allowed me to do anything I set my heart to.  And so if it needs more time to bounce back- that's okay.  And that's a choice I make daily.  

I'm back..

So I know my last post was ages ago on this blog and I started another blog- but I decided to come back to this blog. A lot has been going on the last year.   This year has, in many ways, been the hardest year of my life.  But I'm through the thick of it and I lived to tell about it.  And as much as I'd love to bore you to death with stories of soul searching and "journeys" and challenges- I'll just let you take my word for it.

I'm back to bloggin.  Bloggity McBloggerson. Bloggin Bout Bunz.  My bunz.  But not in a weird way.  Um...

So, anyway.  I hope all 5 my big following of faithful readers are still around to watch me laugh at myself and talk about mochas.  Oh, and fitness and food.  Yada yada yada.