Pushing yourself and enjoying the rewards

So, I decided (somewhat spontaneously) that I would reward myself for doing this bootcamp.  It's not really the fact that I'm getting up to workout- but more that I'm getting up to workout when I probably have every excuse in the book not to.  And instead of making excuses left and right, I'm just doing it.  And that is 90% of the battle with this weight loss stuff.  It's such a mental game.  And the beauty of waking up early to get your workout in is that you're done for the day!  Excuses do not have an opportunity to creep in.  It is the first thing you do.  Now, whether you get the most out of your workout is up to you.  But if my arse is getting out of bed at 5:30am every morning, then I'm going to push myself and make it worth it.   

So then what was my reward??  A massage!  And not only did I get to enjoy a massage, but I think God threw in an extra treat and my massage therapist happened to be a guy who works with athletes and does these intense stretches to help increase flexibility and strength.  It was amazing.  Sort of hurt at some points, but felt great.  I was so tight when I went in and now I'm loosey goosey.  

Some thoughts on staying OP....

I hadn't realized how much stress I carried with me throughout the day just thinking about staying OP.  Instead of just doing it, I'd think about it and feel overwhelmed.  And then I'd just give up before I even tried.  Not productive.  Frankly, it came down to shitting or getting off the pot!  Because it's not worth thinking about it if I couldn't follow through.  And following through got easier and easier the more of a habit it became.  Making it a habit was the initial challenge.   Every day, at every meal I have to choose.  And it can never be about one week or one month or "I have to lose weight by this date" kinda thing.  It has to be hourly.  It has to be broken up into small, bite size pieces or else you'll just choke on the whole thing.  

100% honesty is the other kicker.  I confess that there are days I've come on here saying I've been doing good and staying OP.  When, in reality, I've been upping my portions and sort of half assed tracked my points.  And the funny thing is:  I'm not fooling anyone but myself.  And by not coming clean with myself, I'm not giving myself the opportunity to get back on the horse.  Because I'm trying to convince myself that I was good and I don't know why I'm not losing?When it's all just bull shit.  If I'd stay OP, I'd lose.  End of story.

  Can you relate?