There will always be something...

Like I've said many times before, there will always be parties, holidays, get togethers, you name it.  Staying on plan does not mean you avoid these gatherings, nor does it mean you gorge yourself.  It means you plan.  I've had several things this week that could easily have caused me to over do it.  It takes a lot to avoid the appetizer table with the dips, chips, and beautiful array of sugary goodness.  I've got a special place in my heart for real coke.  That alone would be 3 pts for one serving.  

Do I starve myself?  No.  I do make a point not to be starving upon arrival.  Then I plan.  One serving of this.  One serving of that.  No grazing.  I was able to do this successfully this weekend.  Instead of coke I had diet coke.  Instead of grazing I planned for a heaping helping of one thing I really want.  And no more.  It worked!  I did not have to avoid the party.  I did not have to avoid food.  Of course, having three kids helps.  You don't have time to hang around and munch because at least one of them have to pee or need you to hold them or want to do something.  

I got out and did a mini walk today.  Nothing AP worthy though.  

Here's my tracker:

Breakfast:

Alternative bagel with 1 tbsp Naturally More peanut butter and jelly: 4 pts

Lunch:

Pasta with marinara: 7 pts

Salad with ginger dressing: 4 pts

Snack:

Grande Mocha: 4 pts

granola bar: 4pts

Dinner:

Chili with cheese, tortilla chips and sour cream: 10 pts

Wine: 4 pts

Total: 37 pts

Well I used more flexies than I said last night.  But, I still remained OP!  I have about 10 flexies left for the week.  Monday they renew.  So I'm good.

Had a lot of fun at Jenny's house.  Wine, girls, popcorn, laughing so hard you almost pee your pants....what more can you ask for?  Babies were well behaved.  We didn't leave until 12am.  Didn't get home until 12:30am.   Then when I got home I could not get to sleep.  So I pretty much went to bed at 1:30am.  Then up to feed man child at 3:30, 6:30, 7:30 and up for the day.  Wow, I can't believe I'm coherent to even write this.

My dad is taking my older kids tonight for a spend the night.  He and my stepmom spoil them rotten and then wear them out.  The kids are so excited.  I am too.  Ed and I will attempt to get a date night out of it (man child in tow).  

Tomorrow I'm going to try (haven't told you this Ed) to get to the Step class at 9:15am.  Need to burn some calories!  We have a friend's going away party that night.  Cook out.  Lots of land minds all around me.  I need some extra pts.  

Monday is weigh in!  I'm excited because it looks like I've already lost 2 lbs this week.  

Moving and Grooving...

Things are good.  I will be using some flexies tonight since I'm having an unplanned girl's night with some friends.   Gotta reserve some points for wine!!  I had a crappy lunch day.  I ate at Target with Amelia and Shepherd had a Pizza Hut personal pan pizza and one of those nasty ready made pbj's.  It was a hypoglycemic moments and I was shaking and shoving food into my mouth to feel better.  

Here's my tracker today:

Breakfast:

Luna bar: 4 pts

Mocha: 4 pts

Lunch:

Personal pan pizza: 12 pts (Amelia ate one- normally 14 pts!)

PBJ:7 pts

Snack:

ff popcorn: 2 pts

Dinner:

Penne pasta with marinara: 7 pts

Girl's Night:

Wine allowance: 9 pts

Total: 45 pts

 (10 flexies used, 20 left)

OH and I got on the scale this morning: 175 lbs!!

Sleepy today...

My man child kept me up last night.  I'm not as bright eyed and busy tailed as I was yesterday.  But, I'm happy to report I've been 100% OP, using NO flex so far this week.   Today I have a playdate with some friends.  There will be a yummy lunch of falafel, salad and then homemade icecream.  I'm going to calculate points for falafel and salad and allow myself 1/2 cup of icecream.  Shouldn't be too bad.  I think 1/2 cup of regular icecream is roughly 5-6 pts.  Of course, we all know a REAL serving is 2 cups....

I'm going to work out today.  Probably my Biggest Loser dvd again or a brisk walk on the treadmill.  Either way- I'm going to earn APs today!  I'm tired as hell, but I'm determined.  

Then it's LOST!!!!  

The Plan:

Breakfast:

Lite english muffing with 2 tbsp Naturally More peanut butter: 4 pts

Coffee with soy creamer and sugar: 2 pts

Lunch:

Falafel: 8 pts

Salad: 4 pts

Icecream: 6 pts

Snack:

Pear: 1

Popcorn: 1

Dinner: 

Whole Wheat pasta with pesto (ed's making it): 7 pts

Salad with ginger dressing: 2 pts

Snack:

Chocolate pudding: 2 pts

Estimated total: 37 pts

Going to earn APs so I don't have to use Flex pts.

Tracker/Plan: 

Breakfast:

Sandwich with 1 egg (over medium), 2 slices turkey bacon, 1 oz of mozz cheese and a lite english muffin: 5 pts

Snack:

Mocha: 4 pts

Lunch:

Thai Coconut Soup: 5 pts

Salad with romaine, cucumbers, carrots, and ginger dressing: 2 pts

Pear: 1 pt

Snack:

Chocolate pudding: 2 pts

Apple: 1 pt

Dinner: Shoot for 11 pts (not sure what yet)

Snack:

ff popcorn: 2 pts

wine: 3 pt

36 pts.  Gotta love those breastfeeding points!

Will try to get a walk or some activity in again.  I'm sore from my cardio yesterday, but it feels good.  There is a Body Sculpt class at 7:30pm.  That would be perfect since the kids go to bed at 7pm.  Just depends on what Shepherd does....  If not I suppose I can do a Power Sculpt tape.  

Good Workout

Well, I didn't make it to the sculpt class, but I did choose to get a workout in.  I bought The Biggest Loser Cardio Max and Power Sculpt dvd's a few weeks ago at Target.  From what I can tell by watching Biggest Loser- their workouts are the closest to Total Body and Heat at the Y.  So I nursed Shepherd and put him to bed and quickly ran downstairs to do the workout.   I was able to get a good 30 mins of cardio in and about 15 mins of sculpt.  It was hard, but good.  They have levels on the dvd and I'm confident I'll get up to the highest level soon.  Anyway, I figure I earned roughly 3 APs.  

It's amazing how much I was able to do that a year ago.  My body is remembering, but it's tough.  I have my set of 5 and 8 lb dumbells here.  I had to use 5 lbs.  Where at Total Body I got up to using 10 and 12 lbs dumbells.  10 being my "light" weights.  Wow..  I have a ways to go, but I'm excited to get there.  

I want to get on my treadmill, but I've lost the magnetic thing you have to put in place to get the machine on.  Ya know the thing you hook to yourself incase you fall off while running?  LOL  So I'm not quite sure how to get it working.  Maybe I need to order another one of those things...

Okay, it's 8:30pm and I need to get to bed so that I can keep up with the 4-5 times I'll be getting up all night. 

OH and I stay OP all day.  And I mean every single bite was accounted for!!  

I'm back!

Made it to a meeting!

After I posted this morning I realized it was Monday and that I might be able to make my old meeting for the first time in a year.  I did!  I saw my favorite leader and it was so good to be there.  I always benefit so much from meetings.  And a good leader makes ALL the difference.  I'm very excited to see how much I lose this week.  

A goal this week for me is to not just eat my Flex points because they are there.  My goal is to plan a treat and use them wisely.  I lost all my weight two years ago eating all my daily, APs and Flex.  But my leader reminded me that if I keep the Flex points at bay as much as I can (except use them if I really want a treat) that I'll see faster weight loss.  And I want to see the 160's soon!

For those wanting the Thai Coconut Soup recipe, here it is.  

Tools for success

As a doula I'm familiar with many ways to help a woman cope with labor pain.  And as a woman who just had an unmedicated water birth, I used some of those tools to get me through it.  It was the hardest thing I've done physically (though it's comparable to training for a marathon), but it was so worth it and so rewarding.  One of my favorite tools to use is Guided Imagery.  That's where (at least in childbirth) you visualize something in order to have a positive reaction in your body).  Sometimes we use the image of a rose petal opening to help a woman relax her cervical tissue and let it dilate.   I used hypnobirthing tapes that have guided imagery for weeks prior to my birth to prepare my mind and body.  I also used prayer and meditated on scripture to help me deal with fear.  All of these things helped me have a very gentle, quick waterbirth with no drugs.  

So if I had so much success with those tools for childbirth, why not use them for weightloss?  I suppose I did (unknowingly) back in 2006 when I lost 85 lbs after Amelia's birth.  I visualized myself in size 8 jeans come winter time (she was born in April).  Little did I know I'd actually get down to a size 4!  I walked through my day each morning and "rehearsed" staying OP.  I saw myself eating healthy and sticking to the plan.  I prayed a lot about my weight loss and learning to have self control.  And it worked.  

So now here I am almost 3 years later and I'm on the same journey back down.  I've got 40 lbs to shed and get rid of.  I'm going to begin this week with a new approach.  I'm going to take whatever minute amount of time I have each morning to rehearse my day.  The best time would probably be Shepherd's 7am nursing.  It's quite and I'm awake.  My goal is to see myself staying OP and enojying foods that are good for me and it being EASY!  I remember 3 years ago thinking that WWs never felt like a diet to me.  Just a way of living.   It was easy to manage my points.  I always planned for "naughty" treats with my flex and APs.  Always.  I had wine, ice cream, burgers, cheese dip, etc.  All the things I love.  Just within reason.  

So, today I will stay OP.  And I won't only stay OP, I'll enjoy it and it will be easy.  God says: "For my yoke is easy, my burden is light."  When I rely on God to help me have self control with food I actually have it!  Go figure...  My burden then is light, not heavy.  Just like my food.  J/k

Tracker/Plan:

Breakfast

Soy Mocha : 4 pts

Luna bar: 4 pts

Lunch: 

Left over WW's Italian Post Roast (recipe found in the WW's magazine): 7 pts

Salad with ff italian: 1 pt

Apple: 1 pt

Snack:

Pear: 1 pt

ff chocolate pudding: 2 pts

20 pts so far... (16 left)

Dinner: 

Ed is making Thai Coconut Corn Soup for dinner.  I need to use the recipe builder to see how many points.  But I will figure it out and stay within my points!

Pulling it together

Well, after a great workout on Friday I fell apart food wise.  The culprit was eating out.  That and birthday cake for Ed's dad.  

Ever have those days where you do great and then out of nowhere you inhale points?  My discipline muscle is weak.  I think I just gave in too much in pregnancy and immediate postpartum just for comfort.  Which, we all know is not what food gives us.  Well, maybe initially and then we feel crappy and yuck.

But none of this really matters because excuses are excuses.  The bottom line is that I can choose to half ass my way through this diet and it will take twice as long to lose this weight OR I can just pull it together and get it done!  I'm going for the latter.  I do not want to feel like I feel at this weight.  Just not "me."  Ya know?  I don't want to have to have this "I just had a baby pooch" when my baby is 4 months.  I mean,  I have the loose skin- that's enough for me.  

And really I'd like to lose weight so I don't have moments like these anymore....  I went to Target the other day and saw a friend from high school a couple aisles down.  I avoided him like the plague.  I had the baby in the sling and just tried to stay out of the main aisle.  He ended up seeing me and walking right towards me.  I tried to sort of keep walking like I didn't see him and then he said my name.  Ugh.  I HATE seeing people when I'm fat.  And I just saw him (and all my other high school friends I haven't seen in years) at our 10 year reunion two years ago.  And if you follow my blog you know that one of my main motivations for losing the weight was to be in the best shape for my 10 year reunion.  And I was!  So, needless to say, I was a bit embarrassed to see him.  But, in my defense I had a 6 week old baby in a sling.  :)  And I'm sure he didn't think twice about it.  But still... 

These are the reason why being over weight is just not worth it.  Constantly thinking about it and feeling so insecure when you see people from your past.  It's just not worth the pieces of cake or the hot wings or the fries.  Ya know?

So...here I am on a Sunday evening preparing myself for this week.  I'm thankful my baby is sleeping better and I feel a bit more rested on a daily basis.  This all helps healthy weight loss. Tomorrow there is a Body Sculpt class at 5:30pm at the YMCA.  We'll see how the day unfolds and if I can get there.  I hope I can.  I'm so excited about a class.  I plan to get out and walk in the morning with Shepherd to get in some cardio.  Then if I get to go to the class that'll be icing on the cake.

Okay...here's to picking myself back up and moving forward.

I went to the Y!!!

I officially went to the Y!  Ed watched the little man and I took the older two.  No class, but I got on the elliptical for 30 mins.  300 calories!!

okay- gotta run, but wanted to post.

Making a plan..

I realize I will never resume my workouts if I don't forge ahead and really work it in to my "new" lifestyle.  LOL  Having a third child is my "alternative lifestyle."  So, I've mapped out what classes I could take at the YMCA based on the older kids coming with me and Ed watching little Shepherd.  He can't do the childcare until he's 3 months and even then, it's flu season and I'm just not ready.  

Anyway, here's the "schedule:"

Monday

Body Sculpting 5:30pm-6:25pm (take older kids)

Tuesday
Body Sculpting 7:30pm-8:30pm (after kids are in bed- leave at 7pm)

Wednesday
Power Step 5:30pm-6:20pm (take older kids)

Thursday
Heat 6am-7am (don't take kids - too early)

Saturday
Step 9:15-10am (take older kids)

Sunday
Step 9:15-10am (no childcare on Sundays)

Obviously I don't plan on going every day mentioned, but if the stars align and I'm able to do it- I know what class will be on what day.  Making a plan.  Planning is probably the biggest tool I use in weight loss.  Meals, exercise, rest, etc.  

Okay, I need to make a shopping list for some meals for the weekend and into next week.  My goal is to prep some this weekend so it makes it easier on the weekdays.  We've been ordering out entirely too much lately and I need to cut the calories and the cash.

FYI- scale said 176lbs this morning!

Cold Sunday

I'm enjoying the cold weather.  I can't stand the heat of Georgia in the summer.  Seems like summer lasts through November here.  Anyway, I bundled the kids up and went for a walk this afternoon.  2 miles!  Feeling much easier to walk fast. 

Oh and got on the scale this morning.....177 lbs!!!

I'm on my way back down folks.  

My new favorite quote...

I'm reading Bob Harper's (Biggest Loser) book on learning to change your life in relation to health/fitness and I just read a bit that just hit me in the face.

When you kid yourself and pretend that you are happier, slimmer, and more in control of food that you really are, you not only create a big fat obstacle to achieving your goals, you also undermine your confidence in your ability to do so.  (Bob Harper,   Are You Ready?  Take charge, lose weight, get in shape, and change your life forever. )

I read that and thought: THAT IS ME.  All week I've been"on plan," knowing that I've slipped in food here and there and yet "fudged" my points to make myself feel in control.  And I didn't really do it purposely, but rather stayed on plan half heartedly, while telling myself I was truly doing it.  Know what I mean?  It's this kind of stuff that keeps people on a diet for 6 months with no weight loss.  Then they burn out and just give in.  

Being honest with yourself is so freaking vital to successful weightloss and health.  

In addition to reading Bob's book, I'm also reading Skinny Bitch.  It's a funny, but "in your face" take at dropping the excuses and eating heathy.  Very entertaining and challenging.  All things I need right now to keep me focused.

NSV!!!

That's a "non scale victory" for those who don't know.

I just squeezed my ass into the "tight 10's!"  And they're wearable!!!!

I'm going out to dinner tonight to celebrate a good friend's birthday.  A margarita is in order.

Really, really don't want to post a "before" pic, but...

Morning I gave birth

5 week post partum

I will.  I did it before, I can do it again.  I'm a size 10/12.  I say that because I'm in a loose 12 and 10 tight.  Ugh....

Thursday

I went to the YMCA website and looked at the group fitness schedule to figure out if I should renew my membership.  I wanted to see if there were any classes that I could take that were in the evenings, early mornings or weekends.  The childcare takes kids 3 months and up, so I can't take Shepherd.  But I may be able to sneak away in the evenings with the older kids.  Or even take a Heat class in the early morning.  I so miss the Y.....  

Soon.

Here's my tracker today.  No exercise.  Unless you count a fussy baby that I held in the sling all day.

Breakfast:

Cream of Wheat made with soy milk and butter: 6 pts

Snack:

Soy mocha: 5

Luna bar: 4 pts

Lunch:

Salad with refried beans, salsa and crushed up blue corn chips:  9 pts

WW's twinkie: 1 pts

Snack:

100 calorie chocolate covered pretzels: 2 pts

Dinner:

Bowl and a half of chili over brown rice: 10 pts

Snack:

Red wine: 6 pts

Total: 43 pts  (Used 9 Flex)

15 Flex left 

I ran! I ran!

Well....maybe more of a walk/run.

With more walking than running.

BUT STILL!!!!!

Shepherd took a morning nap and Ed was home working and suggested I go run.  I had tried to start up the treadmill and couldn't find the magnetic string thing that starts it up.  THEN I tried to do one of my new Biggest Loser Cardio dvd's and couldn't find an extra outlet to plug in the dvd player.  It was a comedy of errors, but I managed to get some real exercise!

I probably walked 2 miles.  Running was okay, though I felt like my insides might fall out.  Like giving birth all over again.  

Baby steps...

I've been tracking well and staying faithful to counting every point.  I remember when I lost all my weight in 2006 I did absolutely nothing other than stay honest with my points and stick to it every day.  No exercise, no carb cutting, nothing else but stay on plan.  And I stayed on plan perfectly for about 6 months straight.  I clearly remember the day I went over my points (and flex) and I cried and felt like I was going to gain it all back in one night.  The next day I went to my meeting and my leader said: "It's not about perfection, it's about progress."  THat stuck with me and gave me a vital tool: learn to fall and stand back up.  Don't throw in the towel over one mistake.  And that was how I continued onto my goal and maintained for a year (before getting pregnant again).  

So...I'm doing it again.  

Feeling thinner

 I'm feeling less "fluffy."  Finally starting to see my stomach go down.  I'm still roughly 179, which is frustrating, but I know the drop will happen soon enough.  I've got a cold, which stinks because Shepherd has been sleeping more and it would be perfect for getting back to exercise.  I have been on a few walks, but nothing to write home about.

Here's my tracker:

Breakfast:

Luna bar: 4 pts

Snack: 

Soy Mocha: 4 pts

Lunch:

Kashi Sweet and Sour chicken (frozen meal):  5 pts

Blue corn chips: 3 pts

WW brownie: 2 pts

Gingerale: 3 pts

Snack:

Progresso 0 pt soup: 1 (I had two servings)

Chips: 3 pts

25 pts

Dinner: Keep it around 11 pts.  

Sleep deprived but still tracking!

Tracker:

Breakfast:

100 cal Chewy bar: 2pts

Mocha: 3 pts

Lunch:

Kashi Pasta Pesto meal: 5 pts

Pear: 1 pts

ww bar: 2 pts

Snack:

100 cal chewy bar: 2 pts

Dinner: 

2 slices pizza : 14 pts

Salad: 5 pts

Snack:

WW icecream: 2 pts

APs: Walked 30 mins with Shepherd in sling and kids in double jogger

Total: 36 pts!   (Did I mention how much I LOVE nursing points?)

Right on target!

Sunday

Hey friends.

Went to church today and had lunch with some good friends we hadn't seen in a while.  We ate at an Italian place that I love- Figo.  Unfortunately I was too hungry and the complimentary bread was too good.  But I tried to pace myself the rest of the day.

Here's my tracker:

Breakfast:

Blueberry bagel with butter: 6 pts

Coffee with soy creamer and sugar: 2 pts

Lunch:

Bread: 10 pts (ahem)

Whole Wheat Penne with sauce: 8 pts

Ceasar salad: 3 pts (just a few bites)

Snack:

Almond sticks: 2 pts

Dinner:

Healthy Request chicken noodle soup:4 pts

2 rolls: 2 pts

Small square of brownie: 4 pts

Total: 41 pts. 

Dipped into flex, but no biggies.  Tomorrow my points renew and I'm going to a night meeting!

Saturday Morning....

Day 2 on plan...

Holy McMother Pants my son actually slept 3 hours b/w a feeding last night! I feel like I could conquer the world!

So I've been counting points (for real) for two days now. It's been good. I'm feeling up to the journey and getting back into my jeans. I got on the scale and I'm 179.2 lbs! Good bye 180's FOREVER!!! This means I officially have 39 lbs to lose to get back to pre-pregnancy weight. I figure at 2 lbs per week I'll be back to my old self (IF I chose to stay OP faithfully) in 5 months. That's June! So there's my goal folks!

I'll quickly post my tracker for today.  I've been able to have more variety in my diet now.  I'm still staying away from dairy like the plague, but I've introduced wheat products and Shepherd seems okay with that.  

Breakfast:
Frosted Mini Wheats with vanilla soy milk: 5 pts

Snack:
Grande Soy Mocha (no whip): 5 pts

Lunch:
Chips and Salsa: 6 pts
Coke: 3 pts

Snack
Pear: 1 pt
WW's muffin: 3 pts

Dinner:

Whole Wheat Penne Pasta w/ Pesto and toasted Pine nuts: 8 pts

Salad with Lite Italian dressing (the ones that come in the individual packs): 1 pts

Snack:

Pear: 1 pt

Chocolate Rice Dream: 3 pts

Total: 36 pts