Sunday, January 25, 2009

Pulling it together

Well, after a great workout on Friday I fell apart food wise.  The culprit was eating out.  That and birthday cake for Ed's dad.  

Ever have those days where you do great and then out of nowhere you inhale points?  My discipline muscle is weak.  I think I just gave in too much in pregnancy and immediate postpartum just for comfort.  Which, we all know is not what food gives us.  Well, maybe initially and then we feel crappy and yuck.

But none of this really matters because excuses are excuses.  The bottom line is that I can choose to half ass my way through this diet and it will take twice as long to lose this weight OR I can just pull it together and get it done!  I'm going for the latter.  I do not want to feel like I feel at this weight.  Just not "me."  Ya know?  I don't want to have to have this "I just had a baby pooch" when my baby is 4 months.  I mean,  I have the loose skin- that's enough for me.  

And really I'd like to lose weight so I don't have moments like these anymore....  I went to Target the other day and saw a friend from high school a couple aisles down.  I avoided him like the plague.  I had the baby in the sling and just tried to stay out of the main aisle.  He ended up seeing me and walking right towards me.  I tried to sort of keep walking like I didn't see him and then he said my name.  Ugh.  I HATE seeing people when I'm fat.  And I just saw him (and all my other high school friends I haven't seen in years) at our 10 year reunion two years ago.  And if you follow my blog you know that one of my main motivations for losing the weight was to be in the best shape for my 10 year reunion.  And I was!  So, needless to say, I was a bit embarrassed to see him.  But, in my defense I had a 6 week old baby in a sling.  :)  And I'm sure he didn't think twice about it.  But still... 

These are the reason why being over weight is just not worth it.  Constantly thinking about it and feeling so insecure when you see people from your past.  It's just not worth the pieces of cake or the hot wings or the fries.  Ya know? I am on a Sunday evening preparing myself for this week.  I'm thankful my baby is sleeping better and I feel a bit more rested on a daily basis.  This all helps healthy weight loss. Tomorrow there is a Body Sculpt class at 5:30pm at the YMCA.  We'll see how the day unfolds and if I can get there.  I hope I can.  I'm so excited about a class.  I plan to get out and walk in the morning with Shepherd to get in some cardio.  Then if I get to go to the class that'll be icing on the cake.'s to picking myself back up and moving forward.


Anonymous said...

I have been following your blog for quite a while now. You are an inspiration to me during my weight loss journey. I have my 20 year reunion this June and I want to look the best I have in years. Like you I am not very overweight, just uncomfortable at "this" size. So, far I have lost 5 pounds in two weeks on Weight Watchers. :) I am exercising as much as possibe...I'm a mother to two boys, work part time and go to school part time! A very busy schedule means I have to schedule in my workouts!

I will continue to read your blog for inspiration and I wish you luck in your journey back to a size 4! You have done this before and you will do it again...of that I am sure!!!


Jen Gordon said...

Thanks for your comment Susan! You sound like you have a crazy schedule. I supposed the crazier our schedules get, the more we have to really work the exercise in. But it's so worth it.

I know I'll find my way back to my size 4s! I just hope it's sooner than later. :)

Anonymous said...

Well, I am right there with you reading what you post. Like you I hope to be in a size 4...but for now I am shooting for 8's by my June reunion (right now I am a 12). I figure I can do it because each size is 10 pounds for me and I have been on program for two weeks and have lost 5 pounds! Yipee!

I am rooting you on...good luck!

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